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On the nature of our yearning
We are all longing for something to change. So what is it we seek?
We have been at war for a long time, even if many are in denial of the existence of an ongoing violent conflict. Whether this war is 5, 50, 500, 5000, or 50000 years old… that question will be resolved in time as our hidden history is revealed. All I know is that many of us are fully immersed in the battle to liberate humanity from the increasingly unhidden hand of tyranny imposed by deception.
We see the tangible process of “setting the stage” for epic events, and have a longing for “habbenings” that unmissably shift the collective narrative into a fundamentally different timeline. Many speculate on what that shift might look like, and when it might come; that is not my goal today. Instead, I would like to introspect that yearning feeling, making speakable what is left unsaid and unexamined.
I have done what any professional philosopher might do to address such a difficult issue — had a long hot bath — and come up with two lists. The first is one of things we might think we yearn for, but maybe are not the right things to desire. The second is a shorter list of things that I sense are the real objectives of our deeper yearning. These are offered as tentative thoughts about our inner senses, and I do not claim ubiquity or finality in this analysis.
Is what we seek “truth”? I am not convinced.
Truth is elusive; lies are manifest. A lie is provable in that information is inconsistent over time, or incompatible in its nature. For instance, I long ago concluded that the “official” story of September 11th 2001 was impossible at many levels, but to this day I cannot tell you what really happened. It is OK to yearn for truth, but its nature means it cannot be absolute, permanent, or complete. Yearning for truth sets us up for disappointment.
Is what we seek “justice”? I am not convinced.
We have seen the first of the Durham indictments what inevitably lead us towards the Clinton Foundation and all kinds of treasonous horrors. There is vast military activity and the conspicuous disappearance from the public scene of many celebrities suspected of involvement in crimes against children. Lawyers are gearing up for “Nuremberg 2.0” trials for those responsible for the scamdemic. But yearning for justice puts our fate in external events over which have little to no personal control. That is not a heathy thing.
Is what we seek “certainty”? I am not convinced.
An information war is filled with fraudulent stories, engineered confusion, and plausible deniability. There is a deep pain in watching those we love confuse the “feeling of knowing” with epistemological rigour, and vehemently defending their “sense of certainty” in the face of all evidence to the contrary. We can yearn for the collapse of the “unreality” built from false morality and false logic. Yet we have to recognise that seeking certainty is part of the problem, not the solution, and thus it is unwise to yearn for it.
Is what we seek “vindication”? I am not convinced.
One of the most amusing parts of this crazy journey is typing my name into the search function of social media or web crawler sites and seeing the manufactured vitriol designed to smear me. I know it is all flattery for my effectiveness, and you can invert everything said to restore some reality. But do I seek vindication over the troll, critics, and scorners? Not quite. I do not wish any of them or their families to come to harm (even if justice might prove… terminal). This isn’t a struggle at the personal level for me, and yearning for vindication is a lowly ego motivation and lacks spiritual refinement.
Is what we seek “victory”? I am not convinced.
War is unpleasant and uncomfortable, and this is a barbaric war that rejects any ethical constraints on its conduct. The search for victory removes the immediate cause of the war — an identified enemy — and prospectively ushers in an era of lasting peace. Yet is our yearning for victory? It may seem so, but evil cannot ever be totally vanquished, nor should it be so. Evil serves a purpose to “up our game” culturally, and if we survive its ravages then we enjoy a residue of wisdom so we need not suffer the same assault again. To yearn for victory is to yearn for the end of time — and thus life.
Is what we seek “acceptance”? I am not convinced.
Humanity seems divided right now between two incompatible definitions of “reality”, with little common ground. Many friends and family have fallen victim to lies, and reject us. “You can only come to Thanksgiving if you are jabbed with a proven dangerous gene therapy or stand in the snow outside wearing a muzzle” is the reported (albeit bizarre) experience of many. Yearning to be accepted by those lacking sanity or morality cannot be a good choice. If there is any value in righteous behaviour it must be to reject our desire for acceptance and stand alone if needed.
Is what we seek “unity”? I am not convinced.
A mantra of our movement is “WWG1WGA”, which has many interpretations. One is that of a unity consciousness — to be “good” something has to be good for everyone, and cannot break the “golden rule”. It may be righteous to hunt for unity, but it comes with a danger. We may wish to control others, and deny them their own “soul contract”, which can include profound societal learnings by making fatal mistakes. Unity is not a valid objective in and of itself, because it opposes the legitimacy of others wishing to pursue divergent life paths from us.
Is what we seek “recognition”? I am not convinced.
“I have a degree certificate therefore I am” has replaced “I think therefore I am”, and that is not a benevolent state of affairs. We wish to be acknowledged and recognised for who we truly are, and validated by having our struggles known. We may hope for others to recognise that we “saw through the lies” (and suffered as a consequence) — but yearning for that is not a spiritually desirable path. Better to transcend the need for social or institutional recognition (by having innate infinite worth) rather than long for value to be conferred from society.
Is what we seek “reward”? I am not convinced.
My experience of this war is of nonstop economic warfare and endlessly being on a financial precipice. That’s alright — I can always ask for help when needed should hardship come, and it magically turns up. The pain is inevitable but the suffering is optional. Do I ever dream of a day when that reverses and I have ample resources as my reward for hard work? Of course I do, I am only human! But yearning for that? Definitely not, since that denies me satisfaction and gratitude for what I already have.
Is what we seek “rest”? I am not convinced.
War is exhausting. Information war wears down your mental faculties; spiritual war weighs heavy on the heart. I never saw myself as a warrior before this war, but testing times seem to reveal who we truly are. Right now I am enjoying a brief period of rest after a taxing autumn. Yet rest is not a goal in itself that is worth yearning for. Self care is an intrinsic part of fighting, with time to recuperate from our weariness and wounds. But to yearn for idle times is to deny our purpose and mission in being here at this trying period of history.
That is enough of the antipatterns. What might it be that we truly yearn for?
I yearn for congruence. We are all being actively tortured via “Alice in Wonderland” techniques: mass media gaslighting, confusing definitional reversals, and bizarrely changing rules. This disorders the world, and makes it illegible and hard to navigate. By seeking a higher-order understanding of the world, one can locate these things into a purposeful and congruent framework of sense-making. I yearn for that personal growth, as it allows the senseless butchery and fractured perception to become “whole-y” again.
I yearn for balance. The Daily Lama — a good read on Gab — pointed out that “peace” may not be the be what we yearn for, since that implies a static existence lacking life. What matters is the “unblocking” of the “dammed flows” of life — the river and its banks working in harmony. Right now the world feels very unbalanced, as are our personal lives. A flood is coming, which may sweep much away, but that will eventually subside. The channels of the “river delta of life” will recover their balance after being artificially diverted.
I yearn for fecundity. This may seem like an odd choice of word, but let me qualify it. It is not that I yearn to go on conquests and make more babies (as I long ago failed the recertification for Team Heterosexual™ and don’t seek to requalify). Beating a death cult means being engaged with the cycle of life, which can be expressed in many ways. It could mean caring for the orphaned, or growing a small garden, or raising animal companions. It is to be “pro-life” in the most encompassing sense.
We know that the world faces an imminent and vast upheaval in the near future. Many of us have been preparing for this on every level — spiritual, social, practical, emotional, psychological, etc. At the moment there is a “stuckness” feeling and frustration as we anticipate the blockages to change being removed. I sense that the most profound yearning is not so much for the “unsticking” of history. Rather, I feel we deeply yearn to have the opportunity afterwards to apply our loving nature, warrior faculties, and acquired skills at “maximum force” in the service of life itself.