I know many married couples. A few seem to be in joyful sacred union that nothing will ever end, barring death. Most are in a kind of long-term truce where they tolerate each other, just about. Some are downright unhappy, especially when they blame the other for the woes of the relationship and refuse to examine their own behaviour and contribution. A litmus test of spiritual success seems to be whether sex (or at least affectionate touch) is a joint celebration of the wonder of life, and thus is abundant and continuous; or whether it is a service offered on condition of getting what one seeks from the other partner, and hence is easily withheld and becomes grudging.
I have my own struggles and strife on these matters, but it is from our setbacks that we learn and progress. By seeing relationships through three lenses — casual, contract, and covenant — I am getting to understand more about how we fall short of what is possible and desirable. Those happiest in their most intimate space are spiritually aligned, and perhaps could be classed as “holy warriors”. They are ready to make sacrifices (together) to do the righteous thing, and are unconcerned about their reputation with temporal authorities. Only judgement in the eternal realm matters. All of my past partners have ended up jabbed with the clotshot, which indicates a lack of spiritual alignment with myself.
The state, mass media, and organised religion are brilliant at keeping us focused on the casual and contract types of relationship, and cunningly (and ruthlessly) exclude consideration of the covenant. This is to their advantage, as they are often Satanic (i.e. anti-sacred), but to our detriment. The result is a world that is physically, emotionally, and spiritually violent. People want to please themselves, getting “pleasure profit” from their (sexual and social) behaviour, and are running “bidding wars” to locate that outcome at the least cost. Each relationship is like some MBA financier squeezing his supply chain for a bigger bonus. Until sacredness (especially the birthing and raising of children) is restored to centrality, the suffering will endlessly continue.
Sex, the sacred, and social media